I would have written sooner, but I’ve been busy cleaning bloodstains from the house.
It’s amazing how far they spread after a scene of carnage. I’ve had to wipe off the bathroom counter, the living room wall and the edges of the garbage can. Not to mention mopping the floor. Twice.
I don’t envy all those folks at CSI.
Messy business, all this blood. To be fair, it’s really just a combination of ketchup and chocolate syrup, but it’s easily as goopy and sticky as real blood, with equal ability to stain the carpet.
You can’t do without it, though, and still be a proper zombie.
“Watch where you’re smearing that!” I tell Little Zombie, who’s busily putting bloody handprints all over an olive-green T-shirt that used to belong to Husband Zombie. Down the hall, Slightly Older Zombie is in the bathroom putting the finishing touches on her gory facial scars (and leaving more chocolate syrup on the counter).
Art is suffering, they say.
This particular artistic endeavor has nothing to do with me, however. Husband saw an article about a couple of guys who were looking for extras for the YouTube zombie movie they planned to film down in Brownsville, and he and the Princesses decided to check it out. Evidently the directors decided they’d be really good at staggering around, slack-jawed and mumbling. Not terribly surprising, given the amount of practice they get every time I wake them up for school.
The Princesses have been thrilled to think this might be how the folks on “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” got started. Their first rehearsal was great, Little Princess told me: “There was groaning, moaning, howling, growling, shuffling, falling, chasing, eating!”
I would have gone, but it sounds too much like a staff meeting. Except for the eating part. Put that in and I might like staff meetings more.
Anyway, we here at Undead Central will keep you posted on our Zombie Jamboree.